Victor and Lydia

Congratulations Victor and Lydia! Your wedding day at the Crosby in Rancho Santa Fe was just a gorgeous day! Thank you for affording me the opportunity to capture your day from behind the camera!

You really couldn't have asked for a better day to tie the knot! Or a better location!

Even Jasmine enjoyed it!!!

You two are ever so lucky to have so many fun-filled family and friends ... and for them to have stood by you on your beautiful day... wow!

I wish I could have stayed through the reception. Everyone looked like they were ready to have a nice time together... congratulations on your future!

I love my city!

Flying back into San Diego from ... anywhere really ... is just amazing. The plane descends on this city looking brown and gray and muted blue. But, as in life, the closer you get the more defined everything becomes. The browns turn into darker and lighter shades of life. The blue tones become varied between white to indigo. And life as we know it in this city is unique and troubled and yet troublesome and the same.

But from up here in this seat at the back of the plane it all looks like such a straight forward, simple but busy city. Which reminds me... I love my life in this city!

Even LAPD thinks Paris is special!

I would put money on the fact that we could find another woman who was admitted to the same jail Paris Hilton was taken to this past Sunday for the exact same reason.

However, if we walk through the "common" woman's treatment ... and compared it to Paris' treatment we would find major discrepancies between the two.

Paris was in a cell by herself.
The other woman was probably put into "Gen Pop" ... the general population with individuals who committed all sorts of various crimes... some more dangerous than others.

Paris had originally been sentenced to 45 days jail.
The other woman probably had a longer sentence to start with.

Before Paris even entered jail her sentence had already been reduced to 23 days.
The other woman is probably still required to serve her 45 days.

Today - if you haven't heard already, Paris was released from jail. Wait a second... that's only 3 days served!
And like I said, I'd bet my paycheck on the fact that the other woman still hasn't had her original sentence reduced at all.

There's such a double standard for anyone who is a celebrity. Whether it be holding such individual accountable for public nudity, infidelity, stupid-in-public.... oh, I could just go on.

I heard the press conference ... and still I don't know how ANYONE can justify allowing ANYONE (Paris Hilton or not) to get by on a technicality.

And if they say she had a pre-existing condition which allows her special treatment... I'll tell you what that condition is.... "stupid-in-public".

Who will stand up and take responsibility for their actions?! Who is human enough to do that?!

A Glimpse of Heaven (May '07)

Well, I'm back from my R&R... and I'd love to show you what I got to experience. This is Heaven Gabriella Lauren Haraldsen! And she took right to me.... it's almost as if, even though she'd never seen me before, that she knew she was supposed to love me and hug me and accept me for just who I was... Auntie Lori. Because the first time I held her she buried her head in my shoulder and hugged me back! (Ok maybe she was just tired - it WAS close to midnight!)

Oh! I couldn't wait to introduce her to everyone! I wish I could have brought her home and let everyone give her their own hug. Because Heaven loves hugs and kisses! She is such a delight.... such a delight... giggling, laughing, full of wonderment and surprise and love... she is Heaven...

And like counting on the clock to tick - when she's concentrating on something you can count on her little pudgy feet to start "going a mile a minute"... twirling and twirling...

Look at that smile! Can you tell she loves Auntie Lori (photographer extraordinaire)?! A photographer simply can't tell a baby to smile (say "cheese")... babies only smile at those who look funny!

And here is Heaven adorned in a dress and bonnet made by her Great Grandmother Helen Haraldsen!

Daddy - you're so mean...

So may I introduce you to the newest member of the Haraldsen household... this is Heaven and her proud mommy and daddy - Jody and Loren.

Images captured in a quaint old town of McKinney, Texas ...

R & R (May '07)

Well, I'm off for a few days of rest and relaxation.... much needed and well deserved! My emotions have been up and down this past week ... and coupled w/ the normal busy-ness of LIFE I just need to get away. Why the emotional roller coaster? This past week a long-time family friend passed away... we're also celebrating the engagement of some friends ... and absorbing the news of a potential divorce for another couple of friends.... and then of course I'm dealing with guilt from not getting my mother's day gift to her in time.

So what will I do? Where will I go? I plan to 'disconnect and reconnect' so to speak. Disconnect = from my cyber world. Reconnect = with my life. I'm travelling to visit my lil' brother in Dallas... and his new little bundle of joy... Heaven Gabriella.

Auntie Lori has yet to meet little Heaven... and I'm so looking forward to bestowing lots of hugs and kisses and oohs and aahs on her! Fun pics to follow upon my return...

Cheers...

Solemn Gratitude (May '07)

This morning it is with solemn gratitude that I write. This past week a long-time family friend was on a steamboat cruise in Alaska - enjoying the nature that God so artfully planned out for us. And all I can think of is that our friend didn't want to come back to stinky, smoggy, overly-packed Southern California - so when he took his last breath following a heart attack he joined God in an even more beautiful place. Because of his faith in our Lord Jesus Christ he will sit in God's glory - which to our amazement is much more glorious than Glacier Bay. Dave "Joe" Powell - R.I.P.

And this morning on my walk from the parking garage into the office I was once again reminded of the importance of fulling living every day to it's fullest. Our security guard had breathed his last breath in his truck during his night shift. The police officers and paramedics did all they could to revive him... but it was his time. This kind and gentle giant was an jolly ol' fellow who should've been enjoying his retirement - and instead he was spending his nights in his truck patrolling a mostly empty parking garage. Francisco Metts - R.I.P.

One co-worker put it aptly when he said "This is why we work so hard so that we don't have to be working at his age."

Not to be insensitive and crass - but realistic to the point of the cycle of life. It is another reminder that life happens. Enjoy each day ... leave a legacy... be grateful for the lives we lead.

Spring is almost gone... (May '07)

Here it is the beginning of May and it's almost summer time! And I'm not ready to say 'goodbye' to Spring yet. It seems it JUST sprung - and I haven't yet fully enjoyed it. Before I knew it the orange blossom scent evaporated.... and now I'm dealing with weeds in the backyard already.

Just last week it was nice and cool and a brisk 66 degrees outside. Then I woke up on Sunday morning to an 87 degree day - and the not-so-nice weather man says we're in for a few warm days. I'm NOT very happy about this news today.

But I'll do my best to enjoy spring while it's here... there's a month left before the summer solstice. But the planet seems to be misaligned because summer arrived yesterday in Southern California...

Yup - that's mine...

May I unveil to you my first CD album cover! Yes, I even receive credits in the liner. And the music ain't half bad either.

It can be purchased starting today on Amazon.com. Just search for artist "Nate Harasim". Great guy! What an honor to call you my friend! And like I said - your music's pretty darn hot too!

Can I get in line behind you?!

Simply Exasperating! (Jan '07)

Falling in the "odd news" section of today's news of the North County Times ... headline: "Rhode Island school bans talking at lunch after choking incidents". The article goes on to state that the students cannot talk in the cafeteria (while they are eating) - presumably so that teachers can hear when a student starts to choke. In fact, they are only allowed one trip to the trash can.

So, answer me this... will one of the students sitting near a choking student not take on the responsibility of alerting a teacher that someone is choking? Or maybe address this question... when the kids sit quietly all day long and now they are expected to quietly sit through lunch - when CAN they have social interaction?

Yes - I'm on a soap box. Society uses the "children's safety" excuse as a reason to prohibit them from talking, as a reason to not punish them (no spanking - no using the word "NO" - no squashing their creative license), etc.

However, as I'm seeing it, society is using this excuse to remove independence and responsibility from their worlds... taking away learning opportunities, taking away discipline, taking away responsibility.... oh, I could go on and on.

And, oh - it gets better. Now we get into the realm of double-standards. An excerpt from the school’s website… (St. Rose School: http://www.saintroseschool.com/)

“Peanut Free School – Please remember we are a peanut free school. This means NUTS OF ANY KIND are not allowed in school. There are several students in our school that are allergic to nuts (this includes all kinds) for their safety please refrain from sending in any kind of tree nuts or peanuts.”

OK - so peanut allergies have proven to be life threatening. Understood.... and then in the very next paragraph…

“Asbestos – It is the Diocesan policy to make all parents aware of the fact the school building has asbestos. It is a policy to let you know that the asbestos is inspected each year to assure the safety of the students. It is also a school policy to let you know the yard around the rectory is maintained by a lawn service. The company uses lime and fertilizers. Father has asked that all students and parents refrain from walking on the lawn.”

simply exasperated....

A Step in the Right Direction (Jan '07)

Today the laws will change - which we've been asking for since 911. As of today, anyone flying in from Mexico, Canada and the Caribbean (yes, even U.S. citizens) must present their passport before being allowed to board a flight into the United States. This is most definitely a step in the right direction when it comes to protecting our borders!

Next step? Anyone travelling by land or sea.... you're next!

We're well on our way to protecting this freedom we fight so hard for!!!

Confession (Jan '07)

I didn't watch 'American Idol' last season or the season before or the season before... did you?!

I don't do resolutions (Jan '07)

But I do like to try to improve myself. So, at this time of year I think about how I can improve my person. This doesn’t have anything to do with losing weight or exercising more, spending less or getting rid of debt – it’s more like “Self-Help by Lori”. Things like: I promise to respond to email faster, I’ll try to actually put my laundry away after washing it, I’ll try to dust more often, etc.

But as I look back at last year’s self-help attempts it dawns on me that I don’t even remember what they were. So, either I accomplished them or I miserably failed and gave up somewhere along the way. All of that to say – I’m not going to kick myself or let myself get depressed over the fact that I can’t manage to keep my yard looking decent.

This all goes back to one of Lori’s crazy rules – you’ll accomplish something in life when you’re darn ready to accomplish it. Meaning - when it becomes the priority it’ll get done. Until then don’t beat yourself up over it. There must be some more important things in life to take care of or worry about. So go work on those instead of spending time fretting over something you won’t be able to keep up with.

And oh by the way – HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

Well, LAA-TEE-DAH! (Dec '06)

I received a call earlier in the year to shoot an event for Jenny Craig Int'l. This is the second event I've been asked to do for the company - and wow, what an honor! Until I arrived at this event I had no idea it was going to be such a production. And "production" it was.... film crew, writers and photographers from the TV show "Extra! Extra!" AND "InTouch" magazine were on hand!!! And as the "official photographer" of the event I had an all access pass to everything - and the inside scoop on the surprise star performance! This event was held at the Disney Grand Californian Hotel & Spa - "Where Magic Meets Grandeur". (Guest star? American Idol Season 2 Finalist - Kimberley Locke!!!)

This annual event hosted by Jenny Craig Int'l honors the top franchise owners, franchises and sales personnel. Wow... this event left me speechless! Check out the pics of what each guest received at their tables...

Child's Perspective (Dec '06)

This giddy child has the look of someone getting ready to experience DISNEYLAND for the first time!

And this is what it looks like from a child's perspective...

MERRY. MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! (Dec '06)

It's a good thing… to see CHRIST back in Christmas! It really truly is. It makes me supercalifragilisticexpialidocious-ly happy to see on TV commercials that stores like Wal-Mart, Target, etc have passed over the politically correct propulsion to say "Happy Holidays" in place of "Merry Christmas". To my joy Target added the words "Merry Christmas" to their TV commercial – and the other day and I just about fell over! We have one of those fancy digital video recorders and I practically jumped out of my chair and yelled at my husband to Rewind the commercial so I could make sure I truly did see the words "MERRY CHRISTMAS" across the bottom of the TV screen. We pressed Pause at the right moment and sat there… just a bit stunned.

Welcome Christ – you've been welcomed back into the Holiday season! And once again I will still heartily say to retail clerks and Starbucks baristas "MERRY CHRISTMAS" … and wait for their response. Nine times out of ten this is what happens next – they take a quick peripheral-vision inventory of where their manager is and then say semi-quietly "Merry Christmas" in response. That's OK – I don't expect them to say it as heartily as I did – but just to hear those words gives me hope…. that truly Christ IS welcome in this season.

Even if it's to simply tug at our hearts to remind us that Christmas isn't all about buying gifts for people and "keeping up with the Jones' " – but more importantly a season of peace and joy and hope. This season of the year, whether or not your are a person of faith, serves to remind us that our world is bigger than our hour-long round-trip commute to work. At this time of year our hearts are open a bit more… our giving nature kicks in… and inevitably we are just a bit more human… even for a day. Baby steps…

Raw (Nov '06)

Today I witnessed a Random Act of Kindness that woke me up - out of my pity party of a rough day.

This act was a beautiful gesture from one human to another in the quiet of someone's office... it was an act that celebrated a victory in someone's life - to help frame for this individual what the next chapter of life will hold... and it brought them both to tears. As a mere witness, it did much more than that for me...

So here's my challenge ... (and I too will be taking me up on this challenge!)
Celebrate the life and the victories of those around you - share your "crop" with those who haven't "yielded" quite enough for their own needs - tell/show someone how meaningful their influence has been in your life - focus on helping others rather than what you think you deserve - when you are feeling sorry for yourself do something nice for someone else - noticed or not... spread humanity. Spread a good, pure, loving humanity... a rawness that transcends gender, race, religion ...

I voted today! Did you?! (Nov '06)

No excuse is good enough in my opinion.... Get out there and vote... if you're in line by 8 pm they'll let you vote.

There was a time women weren't allowed to vote... it was elation to walk into the polling place today (to drop off my mail-in ballot which I didn't get in the mail in time) and all of the people in line were WOMEN!!! (I wish I had my camera with me!)

While I'm a believer in the theory that you can make statistics say anything you want them to say - I was blown away w/ this one today... only 30% of registered voters came out to the polls on our last voting day!!!

In some countries people put their VERY LIVES on the lines to vote... and what is 70% of this country too busy to do?! VOTE! Just do it.... no excuses!

Mail in ballots take ALL excuses away... prepare for next time. But in the meantime, grab your voter's guide and go stand in line to vote. Shoot - if you don't have a voter's guide just go get in line - I'm sure there's a voter's guide there you can use to read up on items.

It makes sense - you vote ... if you don't vote you don't deserve the right to complain about the decisions our gov't is making. Get out there... no excuses. No whiners!

Voting is not a privilege - IT'S A DUTY!

Voter Lori

"When I first saw Heaven, I lost it!" (Nov '06)

"When I first saw Heaven, I lost it!" - Loren Haraldsen

It is my pleasure to announce that there is a new Baby Haraldsen!

Heaven Gabriella Lauren Haraldsen was born...
birthdate - November 5, 2006
time of birth - 9:18 pm (Dallas, TX time)
weighing in at 6 lbs, 8 oz.
stretching to 19 1/2 inches long...

This picture was taken by one of the Haraldsen grandparents (Gene or Janie) - who flew into Texas just in time!

Now - pardon me... I've lost it and need to compose myself.... - Auntie Lori

"Resounding Message" (Nov '06)

Was Rev. Ted Haggard caught red-handed? Are the allegations true that this well-respected pastor had hired a male prostitute, had a long-term relationship with this person and purchased drugs from him? Is this the truth? Is this a ploy? We may never know the truth on this... even though the media may press him and his religious superiors may force him to talk ... we may never know... PERIOD. At this point it's between He and his Maker.

The resounding message I take from this (even in my disappointment and wonderment that a brother in the Lord may have turned on his church and his marriage and his family) is that we will all fail... but I often wonder, how many lessons will we endure to finally learn the resounding message behind the lesson?! Apparently as many times as it takes....

No matter your faith, no matter your character, no matter your ability to undergo pressure and resist (like a fortress)... we will ALL give in to the rotten things in life that tempt the core values we've been built on.

Not one of us is better than another... we will ALL disappoint other human beings. We will ALL fall short of our glory... and the glory of our Maker.

Yet, upon reflection from a much more positive outlook, written deep down inside this lesson is resounding message #2... all we can do is try our very best to live up to the values we've been built on, to the character we've been fashioned like, and what we know deep down within our beings to be the right thing ... that which is the truth for our lives.

We will fail... but we will most likely have more successes than failures if we continue to try our hardest....

my new mantra (oct '06)

Quoted in Laurence Fishburne's movie "Akeelah and The Bee"

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is out light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented and fabulous. Actually, who are you not to be?

"You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn't serve the world. There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other peple won't feel insecure around you.

"We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us - it's in everyone.

"And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others."

- Marianne Williamson

Awakening (Oct '06)

Today is a symbolic day. It represents the day I woke up. It represents the day I came out of a cocoon. It represents the moment in time when I realized my life as I knew it was in fact no longer. And NOW, I had the chance to create a whole new life for myself!

Eleven years ago today I went home after work to find that my husband of 1 1/2 years had left me. I walked in the front door of our small apartment to find the couch in the middle of the living room - with what was left of our belongings piled on top of it. No tv, no dining room table, no recliner, no coffee table - just the couch. He even took the can opener. That's so significant because when he "left for work" early that morning he kissed me goodbye and as I was still in a state of dreaminess I remember him whispering - "When I get home from work we'll go grocery shopping - the only food left in the house is canned."

The problem was he knew he wouldn't be coming home. In fact, his brothers knew he wouldn't be coming home. His family had planned ahead of time to take this day off of work so they could help him move out while I was at work. And from here on out I will spare you the rest of the messy details...

What stands out about this day is that Lori could now be herself again! When I fell in love with this man I fell hard. And I was willing to sacrifice a lot of myself and who I was just to be with him. In fact, I had lost who I was in the process.

So, as I drove to my parents' house later that evening a bittersweet realization came over my entire being. I could now, finally, go back to the old Lori. This crazy, you-never-know-what-to-expect, trouble-makin' girl had a mind of her own ... and within that mind was housed big dreams!

It happened on a Friday afternoon... and this year's anniversary of what I affectionately call my "Freedom Day" is a Friday as well. This day will long be remembered as my day of re-birth. Friday October 20th. About 2 pm.... I realized my life had once again begun.

Here was my chance to emerge ... but not necessary "like new". I was well aware of my "scrapes and bruises", and at the same time I was nearly proud of them. If I were given the chance to change anything about my past, including those 2 years of my life I wouldn't change a single decision ... because of those events I emerged a stronger, wiser, less naive, and yet gentler woman.

Today I stand proud of myself - proud of how I conducted myself through both the marriage and the divorce. I'm proud to say I gave that marriage everything I knew to give. I gave all I could and did everything I knew to do to keep it together. I walked out of that half-empty apartment knowing I hadn't given up with any "ifs" running through my head. And still, I'm proud of who I've become in the wake of some pretty harsh emotional abuse and the ultimate abandonment. I'm proud of me.

I'm awake.

Nothing could be better....

Wasps and car accidents (Sept '06)

No, not W.A.S.P.s... but wasps. The ones that everyone is scared of (ok - I guess some people could be scared of W.A.S.P.s too... but I digress). I'm not too happy with them this morning. Specifically the bright orange one that jumped right out and got me this morning! I went after my attacker and killed him... which made me feel better.

But it's been well over two hours now... and this thing is starting to itch!

I'm not at all happy this morning... not to mention my usual 20 minute commute turned into a 1 hour and 20 minute commute due to an accident on the freeway.

So for those of you afraid that I got in a car accident after the wasp attacked... glad you stopped in for a read this morning...

OK - on to bigger and better...

This time - the rumors may ring true!

I just read an article in the San Diego Union Tribune that sets the record straight! Eric Clapton HAS been seen out and about in Escondido several times in the past 12 months! We heard through a waiter at IHOP that he stopped in one night for dinner - yeah right! We even asked each other - "What's in Escondido that Eric Clapton would like to see?!"

Then my chiropractor shared a rumor he had heard - that Eric Clapton sent a thank you note to one of the schwanky restaurants on Grand Ave thanking them for the wonderful service and a chance to blend in to the crowd! And again, I thought to myself "Whatever, Eric Clapton wouldn't take the time to write a thank you note!"

But this article proves me wrong.... at least the part about him being in Escondido. Whether or not he wrote a thank you note - I may never know.

Link to article: http://www.signonsandiego.com/news/northcounty/20060922-9999-6m22esco.html

Mr. Clapton - if you ever read this, THANK YOU! Just knowing you visited our city, and then named an album after it... wow! You must think highly of the city I've called home for over 2 decades now! Hope you feel comfortable enough to return someday! Please know... you're always welcome to blend in...

Racist 'Survivor"? (Sept '06)

What's the big deal?! They've pitted all sorts of "tribes" against each other from the beginning. So as they head into this season they have to find something new and fresh! What?! They are going to pit race against race?!

Big deal... from where I sit, it looks like they're stating the obvious.

Most people stereotype without even realizing it. So, I sarcastically ask, CBS decides to state the obvious while creating some more drama to appeal to an even broader crowd and we're SURPRISED by this?!

Think about it though... as some of these "tribe" members are eliminated they'll have to make new alliances. Then they will pair up a mexican with an asian, or black with white... and think of all the extra drama that will create being that they used to be enemies?! It's ripe for the Fall lineup... and for the Fall drama... why are we surprised?!

Baby Brooklyne (Sept '06)

Another baby has entered our world! My cousin Sarah Marshek-Aldous has brought the first Marshek grandbaby into this world! And she's got those pudgy Marshek cheeks! Yet, Brooklyne looks just like her Dad Jason! What a joy it was to wait out the labor w/ the rest of the Paul Marshek family ... seriously, whenever we're together there's bound to be laughter. Even in the hospital!

Brooklyne arrived after over 24 hours of labor - and on Labor Day weekend! And even better, Brooklyne and Paul now share the same birthday weekend!

Brooklyne set some records too... She is Paul and Cheryl's first grandbaby! And Grampa Marshek's first great grandbaby! And the only baby known to mankind to have such a plethora of loving and laughing aunts, uncles, great aunts/uncles, second cousins, and grandparents!

Therefore, I'd like to introduce for the very first time...

Brooklyne Lynn Aldous
Born 9-1-06 at 10:30 pm
Weighing in at 6 lbs, 6 oz
Stretching to 19 inches long

Welcome to our world...

As you journey (Aug '06)

I wanted to share this poem. It was on a birthday card which I've kept for years... I don't know who wrote it, but I'd like to meet them someday.

"As you journey through life, choose your destinations well, but do not hurry there. You will arrive soon enough. Wander the back roads and forgotten paths, keeping your destination in your heart like the fixed point of a compass. Seek out new voices, strange sights, and ideas foreign to your own. Such things are riches for the soul. And if, upon arrival, you find that your destination is not exactly as you had dreamed, do not be disappointed. Think of all you would have missed but for the journey there, and know that the true worth of your travels lies not in where you come to be at journey's end, but in who you came to be along the way." - anonymous

I witnessed 2 miracles in 2 days! (Aug '06)

The entry just below this one talks briefly about the miracle birth of baby Kevin (which I was witness to)... and the 2nd miracle in just as many days was my great friend Julia Alter - getting married!!!

That's right folks... for those of you who are feeling the need to do so, I recommend we take a moment of silence for the past single life of Julia Alter's. Because it's history!

Julia found her treasure trove ... in Michael Canvin! Not that Julia won't do this but I have to tell the whole world that she found a GEM in this man! He cherishes her, is enthralled by her words, nourishes her creativity, and most importantly loves her in the same profound manner in which she loves him... with every last morsel in her!

I was witness, photographer, crying fool, and proud friend of my Julia yesterday. What an honor to be a part of this day...

The wonders of a newborn baby! (Aug '06)

As I have done for a few of my girlfriends, I went to the hospital with my friend Becki yesterday for the delivery of her 1st baby boy! (They have 2 girls already - 7 yrs and 3 yrs.) And while I've been through the delivery of four babies so far, it's just so amazing to watch the miracle of birth unfold! All of the emotions (fear, excitement, pain, gratefulness, anticipation) colliding in 1 little moment!

While I'm not yet a mother, I can't yet KNOW what those feelings are and how they take over your being... but as a photographer, I feel that I live just a little bit of someone else's life when I'm taking in their world as it is happening.

May I introduce the beautiful young man brought into the world yesterday... Today I am so proud to be Auntie Lori! And thrilled beyond belief... I cannot imagine how his parents are feeling today.

Kevin Lee McAdow was born 8/23/06 at 10:50 am. Weighing in at 8 lbs, 6 oz... and stretching out to 19 inches.

For Once... (Aug '06)

For once... someone in Hollywood accepts responsibilities for his actions! Thank you, Mel Gibson, for pleading "no contest" regarding the charges against you when arrested while speeding, and all the while very much intoxicated.

Mel - you're receiving loads and loads of flack from your associates (some of them being so-called 'friends'), but I for one am proud to say that you and I are are only human. And to step up and take accept responsibility for our own actions is human. Thanks for not being like Britney Spears and blaming it on the paparazzi! Thanks for being straight up from the beginning and simply apologizing for some very bad decisions.

The rest of Hollywood, and the rest of humanity, could learn something you - from both the bad decisions and the good. Hats off to you, Mr. Gibson!

'A Nation of Wimps'... an MSN article (Aug '06)

http://health.msn.com/pregnancykids/articlepage.aspx?cp-documentid=100142037&GT1=8404

If you have children or not, we can all learn from what psychologists are saying about the dangers of overprotecting our nation's children. Not just your own children... but society as a whole. The link above will take you to a semi-lengthy article... but in my opinion, well worth the read! Well worth some time to think about how society could be creating a 'Nation of Wimps'!

While my husband and I don't have any children, we have learned gazillions of lessons from friends with children. We soak up the good and the bad when it comes to discipline styles, how parents react to problems with their children (self-induced or not), and then farther on down the road to hear what they would do differently.

How many mothers would take parenting advice from a woman without children?! Not many. And that's OK. If I were a mom I wouldn't take advice from me either. However, there may be something to that piece of wisdom that infers those farther away from the problem might see better solutions than those people in the middle of the problem.

But psychologists are now announcing what I've been theorizing for a long time: the over-protective and hyper-concerned parent can do more damage to their kids than they realize. By cushioning all of the play grounds and taking away tether ball from the play grounds (because someone could get a concussion from that flying ball) we are taking away their chances to learn to cope, to deal with anxiety, to learn some tough lessons in life, to push on through adversity, to be strong in the midst of fear, ... I could go on. Instead they come running to mommy and daddy to solve all of their problems... because that's how they've learned to handle conflict.

What long term message are we sending our children about resolving conflict if we run to their defense all the time? That they aren't quite capable of resolving it themselves? What message are we sending them when we jump from our chairs to catch them upon their stumble? That they aren't capable of handling any pain in their lives and that they should eliminate all risk from their lives?

For more thoughts on this topic see entry below entitled "Was I born in the wrong century?!" (Mar '06)

In Love with Old Escondido (May '06)

I affectionately call it "The 'Hood". It's Old Escondido. Its charm and warmth and curiosities are plenty.

And I got quite the treat on Mother's Day. I volunteered to be the resident photographer for an annual event that draws gawkers from near and far. 2006 was the 9th Annual Mother's Day Home Tour - where 5 precious homes were featured. The house pictured to the right is known as the "Beach House", built in 1896.

It's one of the reasons I chose to live in Old Escondido. Over 10 years ago I worked at a financial planning office in The 'Hood ... and at lunch I'd walk the streets dreaming about living in many of the homes. However, my time at that job came to an end and I didn't get to spend as much time dreaming of simpler times. Until I finally stumbled upon the opportunity to find my own home - I knew what neighborhood I wanted to buy in at least (if at all possible). And I did.... (no, it's not the Beach House - but I love my humble home the same)... first chance I got - I bought!

This weekend I got the chance to walk into various scenes in history... this Queen Anne Victorian built in 1896, a Mediterranean Style bungalow (1926), a Dutch Colonial (1925) and two other homes built near the turn of the century which exude simplicity, an easier life, a time of quieter evenings with the family... and I got to capture 2006's version of what those homes look like! Just for a moment... just a speck on the long timeline we know as eternity...

As a photographer (and a lover of history) - this is one of the highest honors. To preserve history and to show today's developments as well. While life shows us that we are a product of our past, today shows us our possibilities!

I can't wait to see more...

"Illegal" is the point... (April '06)

For the past 20+ years I've lived in north San Diego county. About a 40 minute drive from the Mexico-US border... and surrounded by more mexican food drive-thrus within a 10 mile radius than Starbucks! I could NOT survive without mexican food (or espresso). I would be much less of a person without the influence of my mexican friends. I would be a very boring person if I were not surrounded by so much culture. My first job (over 15 yrs ago) was in a mexican restaurant in my hometown of San Marcos, California. While the owner and I didn't work very well together, we still frequent their establishment and give them regular business for our annual "Gringo de Mayo" fiesta. You see, at heart I'm an international cosmopolitan! I've travelled to a dozen different countries (and have at least a dozen more on the waiting list)... I'm an international business student... I love learning of the cultures and history of all!

But believe me, my life in San Diego has also been doused with a number of graffiti taggers in the 'hood... and I've got some stories of other law abusing immigrants (ie. me chasing down a pair of caballeros attempting to leave the scene of a car accident, sexual harrassment directed towards me in the workplace, a man strangling his girlfriend in a car on the side of the road, a man running through my piece of property with a machete in his hand while helicopters flew overhead in search of him ... I could go on). My point in this? This would happen anywhere...

But again.... I would be a much different person (much LESS of a person) if it weren't for the cultural forces surrounding me. While I firmly believe that this country was built by immigrants FOR immigrants, I have a problem with the "illegal" part. Currently our nation is in the middle of an immigration crisis. And due to the geography in north San Diego county a lot of mexican families are affected by this. But I'll state my opinion plainly - I have a problem with immigrants attempting to tell us that all people in the U.S. deserve to stay here whether they are here legally or not.

Please, I welcome you. Come be a part of our society - but please respect this land by being upstanding, law-abiding citizens who pay taxes with the rest of us...

While I don' t think the U.S. Gov't has done everything they could possibly do to keep illegal immigrants from crossing our borders - I do believe that we are all responsible for ourselves and our futures. And while I don't know what will happen to our economy with the May 1st "All American Boycott" - I DO know this: those participating in the boycott will be drawing a line as to who is educated and who is uneducated. This proposed bill is to keep out ILLEGAL immigrants of all descents... to provide additional border protection... to keep the terrorists out. It's not directed at the mexicans on the whole... it's not directed towards those families that wish to improve their standards of living! My own descendants came here from Norway and Germany... like so many of our families, our roots are of immigrants.

What can we learn through all of this? We can be more accepting of our differences... and we can do away with even more or our negative stereotypes ... let's learn to embrace diversity...

Expectations (April '06)

I don’t usually make “New Year’s Resolutions”… and in fact my 2006 started with the mantra of “This is MY year”. I was starting to see the light at the end of the tunnel for some long-term financial goals. I was starting to see some of the pieces fit together in my journey for “my life with less drama - starring Lori” (including less reality tv). I was starting to truly feel grounded in what I knew I wanted to do in my future. (Yes, I’m married… I own my own home… I’ve been working at the same “day job” for 9 years… and I don’t really have a heck of a lot to complain about.) I am starting to feel that conflict is leaving my world… and the peace is settling.
Maybe this is par for the course? Maybe I’m just “growing up” a bit more? Maybe I truly feel what I’ve been saying for so long … that I like who I am, flaws and all. Maybe I’m ready to admit the things about myself I don’t like – and learn to simply deal with it. I don’t really know.

To steal a term from a well-known daytime talk show host “One thing I know…” is that this year - I’m taking care of me. I’m making decisions for me. I’m learning to put my goals and plans and dreams more toward to the top of the “to do list” … save for the grace of Christ and His intervening in my world… I’m living for me rather than those in this world who have expectations on me.

Security is mostly a superstition... (April '06)

"Security is mostly a superstition. It does not exist in nature, nor do the children of men as a whole experience it. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." Helen Keller

Was I born in the wrong century?!

As of late I've been pondering the thoughts of 'Risk vs Reward'. Asking myself "Should we focus on eliminating all risk from our lives – thereby protecting us from every possibility of error or danger?" OR "Should we enjoy living our lives knowing that if we lived solely in fear then we wouldn't really be living?" OR "Is there such a thing as finding a sensible balance by calculating the risks in our world?"

I think I was born in the wrong century… In the early 1900's children walked home from school – sometimes several miles in each direction. Shucks – even in the 1980's when I was in grade school I was walking or biking home from school by myself – and one day I didn't go home like I was supposed to (and I got in trouble for it). But these days parents are considered to be endangering the lives of their children if they are asked to walk home from school. And don't even think about leaving your children alone at home – that's 'neglect' (even if they ARE 12 years old)! And don't leave them in the car at the convenience store parking lot if you run in for a bag of ice – that's endangerment AND neglect. But really – I'm now 32 years of age and I and my brother and our friends (and probably most of my readers as well) have survived that type of "mistreatment".

Please don't think I'm being cold-hearted and obtuse with my words and emotions here. My heart goes out to every single child and family member who has ever had any horrible event ever happen to them. But I ask out of a bit of dismay and a bit of concern for where this train of thought of living in a protective bubble could lead us - when did our views change? Was it when a misguided child wandered off somewhere or with someone he/she wasn't supposed to? Was it when one very unfortunate and obviously distracted father parked the car at the 'park-n-ride' and left his sleeping baby boy in the back seat on a hot day? Was it when a child with a peanut butter allergy ate something he very well knew he shouldn't have? Some may propose it was the events that transpired on 9/11 that led us to this protective frame of mind...

But I ask – how much can we protect ourselves and our own family from what I view as "the inevitable"? In my humble opinion, our days our numbered. And in my opinion, when it's "our time" it's just that – it's our time. So do we look around each corner and fear and wonder and focus on what could possibly go wrong before stepping out? Or – since we only have so much time - do we go after our dreams and ambitions and live in hope with what opportunities and gifts HAVE been given to us? My point: There is a definite balance between living in fear and LIVING.

Do we teach our children that it's better to be safe than sorry? To limit their creativity and imaginations by putting them in a box and keeping them from spreading their wings and … I could go on. Or do we INSTILL creativity and the desire to learn and achieve – and teach our children, and instill in our SOCIETY, the meaning of adventure and excitement for the unknown? Even if it means tackling our innner fears and becoming better people for it?

At what point do our careful ways (with what I even wouldn't hesitate to call "truly good intentions") become superfluous?! Do we decide not to go outside anymore because of what germs we may catch?! Is this the Cold War of the '50s and '60s in a different form? Should we start dusting off the furniture in our basements – are we moving back downstairs soon?! What happens when our children play in that mud puddle in the backyard when we aren't watching?! Now I may be getting a little ridiculous here – but what happens when they want a driver's license when they are 16 years old? At what point is it just too dangerous for us to let them live their lives?!

One example: Today CNN.com is relaying a story out of Rhode Island (WLNE) about a man and his best friend (German Shepherd named Shultz) playing catch when things all of a sudden went horribly wrong. The 9 ½ " long stick got lodged in the side of the dog. The dog's owner says he will never play fetch with his dog again… really? Is this what this is coming to?! Is someone going to propose that we can no longer play fetch with our dogs – or PETA will come after us for endangering our dogs' lives?! Really?!

Admittedly, I know Shultz and his owner are an extreme example… but I must admit, I think a lot of what our society is already doing on a daily basis is a bit extreme!!! But because of the slow evolution of it all, it doesn't seem extreme to us. And when did we decide our children didn't have to be held responsible for their actions anymore? Because if we spanked them or used the word "no" with them or made them take a time out or apologize to someone they wronged then it might quelch their 'sense of self' or be considered 'mistreatment'. Really?!

(This leads me into what could be a blog topic of it's own – If we don't believe in teaching our children the importance of being responsible for their own actions - and being CONSISTENT in this - then how can we expect them to respect authority - and others at all for that matter - how can we teach them to live with a purpose and to be grateful for what is before them? Compare that to most of our 21st century, poorly-adjusted, selfishly demanding, and out of control screamers and whiners and tantrum-throwers cutting in line in front of people or imposing their own way – and feeling entitled to it all along?! Granted – I know some of you will wonder why I have the gall to say some parents aren't doing right by their children's future because I've never raised my own children. But I've been a responsible child and somehow I survived it - and I've been a significantly contributing adult in the lives of children not my own - and I've seen some well-grounded and well-adjusted parents (who were also once children) make some smart long-term decisions in regards to how they raise their children – and I've seen the outcome of their decisions – and in my opinion, something today and in the near future is going very wrong.)

Now – can I go back in time and live with the Ingalls' family in the little house, you know, the one on the prairie? Where the kids played in the dirt, played with all sorts of crazy bugs and spiders, walked home from school, were solely responsible for some of the household chores and if they didn't get done then dinner had to wait, and got up early in the morning to help dad out back - even on the weekends, got sick or hurt from time to time - and learned to deal with it, and saved their own money instead of it just being given to them when they asked for it, and being punished when it was warranted. Wait - this sounds a tad familiar. It sounds like how my parents raised me. Call me 'old-fashioned', but I think I would have liked it back then… save for the fact that I wouldn't have access to the internet where I could blog all my inner ponderings…

Was I born in the wrong century? (Mar '06)

As of late I’ve been pondering the thoughts of 'Risk vs Reward'. Asking myself “Should we focus on eliminating all risk from our lives – thereby protecting us from every possibility of error or danger?” OR “Should we enjoy living our lives knowing that if we lived solely in fear then we wouldn’t really be living?” OR "Is there such a thing as finding a sensible balance by calculating the risks in our world?"

I think I was born in the wrong century… In the early 1900’s children walked home from school – sometimes several miles in each direction. Shucks – even in the 1980’s when I was in grade school I was walking or biking home from school by myself – and one day I didn't go home like I was supposed to (and I got in trouble for it). But these days parents are considered to be endangering the lives of their children if they are asked to walk home from school. And don’t even think about leaving your children alone at home – that’s 'neglect' (even if they ARE 12 years old)! And don’t leave them in the car at the convenience store parking lot if you run in for a bag of ice – that’s endangerment AND neglect. But really – I’m now 32 years of age and I and my brother and our friends (and probably most of my readers as well) have survived that type of “mistreatment”.

Please don’t think I’m being cold-hearted and obtuse with my words and emotions here. My heart goes out to every single child and family member who has ever had any horrible event ever happen to them. But I ask out of a bit of dismay and a bit of concern for where this train of thought of living in a protective bubble could lead us - when did our views change? Was it when a misguided child wandered off somewhere or with someone he/she wasn’t supposed to? Was it when one very unfortunate and obviously distracted father parked the car at the ‘park-n-ride’ and left his sleeping baby boy in the back seat on a hot day? Was it when a child with a peanut butter allergy ate something he very well knew he shouldn’t have? Some may propose it was the events that transpired on 9/11 that led us to this protective frame of mind...

But I ask – how much can we protect ourselves and our own family from what I view as “the inevitable”? In my humble opinion, our days our numbered. And in my opinion, when it’s “our time” it’s just that – it’s our time. So do we look around each corner and fear and wonder and focus on what could possibly go wrong before stepping out? Or – since we only have so much time - do we go after our dreams and ambitions and live in hope with what opportunities and gifts HAVE been given to us? My point: There is a definite balance between living in fear and LIVING.

Do we teach our children that it’s better to be safe than sorry? To limit their creativity and imaginations by putting them in a box and keeping them from spreading their wings and … I could go on. Or do we INSTILL creativity and the desire to learn and achieve – and teach our children, and instill in our SOCIETY, the meaning of adventure and excitement for the unknown? Even if it means tackling our innner fears and becoming better people for it?

At what point do our careful ways (with what I even wouldn’t hesitate to call “truly good intentions”) become superfluous?! Do we decide not to go outside anymore because of what germs we may catch?! Is this the Cold War of the ‘50s and ‘60s in a different form? Should we start dusting off the furniture in our basements – are we moving back downstairs soon?! What happens when our children play in that mud puddle in the backyard when we aren’t watching?! Now I may be getting a little ridiculous here – but what happens when they want a driver’s license when they are 16 years old? At what point is it just too dangerous for us to let them live their lives?!

One example: Today CNN.com is relaying a story out of Rhode Island (WLNE) about a man and his best friend (German Shepherd named Shultz) playing catch when things all of a sudden went horribly wrong. The 9 ½ “ long stick got lodged in the side of the dog. The dog’s owner says he will never play fetch with his dog again… really? Is this what this is coming to?! Is someone going to propose that we can no longer play fetch with our dogs – or PETA will come after us for endangering our dogs’ lives?! Really?!

Admittedly, I know Shultz and his owner are an extreme example… but I must admit, I think a lot of what our society is already doing on a daily basis is a bit extreme!!! But because of the slow evolution of it all, it doesn’t seem extreme to us. And when did we decide our children didn't have to be held responsible for their actions anymore? Because if we spanked them or used the word "no” with them or made them take a time out or apologize to someone they wronged then it might quelch their ‘sense of self’ or be considered ‘mistreatment’. Really?!

(This leads me into what could be a blog topic of it's own – If we don’t believe in teaching our children the importance of being responsible for their own actions - and being CONSISTENT in this - then how can we expect them to respect authority - and others at all for that matter - how can we teach them to live with a purpose and to be grateful for what is before them? Compare that to most of our 21st century, poorly-adjusted, selfishly demanding, and out of control screamers and whiners and tantrum-throwers cutting in line in front of people or imposing their own way – and feeling entitled to it all along?! Granted – I know some of you will wonder why I have the gall to say some parents aren’t doing right by their children’s future because I’ve never raised my own children. But I’ve been a responsible child and somehow I survived it - and I’ve been a significantly contributing adult in the lives of children not my own - and I’ve seen some well-grounded and well-adjusted parents (who were also once children) make some smart long-term decisions in regards to how they raise their children – and I’ve seen the outcome of their decisions – and in my opinion, something today and in the near future is going very wrong.)

Now – can I go back in time and live with the Ingalls’ family in the little house, you know, the one on the prairie? Where the kids played in the dirt, played with all sorts of crazy bugs and spiders, walked home from school, were solely responsible for some of the household chores and if they didn't get done then dinner had to wait, and got up early in the morning to help dad out back - even on the weekends, got sick or hurt from time to time - and learned to deal with it, and saved their own money instead of it just being given to them when they asked for it, and being punished when it was warranted. Wait - this sounds a tad familiar. It sounds like how my parents raised me. Call me 'old-fashioned', but I think I would have liked it back then… save for the fact that I wouldn’t have access to the internet where I could blog all my inner ponderings…

Ordinary people... (Feb '06)

Quite often I'm reminded of how we don't really live very ordinary lives. Instead we are ordinary people living extraordinary lives! Regularly I get a sense of restlessness - as if my mind, soul or body is telling me it's time for some change because life has become too routine... too drab... too hum drum.

For instance - twice in the past week my pilot brother has called while strolling through the Dallas-Fort Worth airport.... upon the sightings of some well known individuals. He walked into the bathroom and standing in the corner is Ted Nugent - shoveling a cookie into his mouth. And then just a few days later he saw Jesse James (from the tv show 'Monster Garage' and tattooed husband of Sandra Bullock).

And I am awed and amazed by the lives celebrities must live. And then I wake up the next morning, sometimes having to drag myself out of bed, and come to work to sit down to start the same daily routine over again. But this morning I took some extra time to soak in my surroundings.

Within arms' reach are pictures of my 'nearest and dearest' - these bring a smile to my face - and the unforgettable times flood in. Pictures from travels - from where I sit I see some exquisite sights from Amsterdam (Netherlands), Brussels (Belgium), Florence (Italy), Geneva (Switzerland), Y'voire (France), Boston MA, Portland OR and Santa Barbara, Santa Cruz and San Diego CA. And the memories from these places take over and I realize - my life really isn't so hum drum!


It dawns on me... isn't it all in how you view your world?! The objects in my pictures are everyday sights to the people living near them. But they were, and continue to be, so amazing to me - because I had just witnessed them for the first time. All of this to say - we just need to go about our days doing the best we can with what we've been given and for what we've been called to do in our daily lives - and at the same time keep our eyes open! We just never know what we're going to see!!!

"Life was meant to be lived, and curiosity must be kept alive. One must never, for whatever reason, turn one’s back on life." - Eleanor Roosevelt

"Life is either a daring adventure or nothing." - Helen Keller

Emotions (Feb '06)

Today is what I call a "sad day".... I don't know WHY I'm feeling blue... I just am. When my husband asks why I'm not smiling more - I don't have a specific reason. It's just one of those days where I woke up sad and I choose to stick it out through these emotions.

Maybe I won't figure out WHY I'm sad... maybe I won't have a great epiphany as to WHAT occurred that is making me feel sad... maybe I will just LIVE in these emotions and let it be... maybe I'm OK w/ the tears running down my face all the way to work... maybe it's OK for me to face the world today without a cheery smile and optimistic outlook.

Does it make me "depressed"? No... not clinically. Does it make me bitchy? No... I'm still responsible for my actions and know when not to speak or act out in anger ... most of the time. Does it make me an uncontrollable, emotional wreck? No... Does it make me a weak human being? No... I'm just living through the emotions... we all have them. So instead of "stuffing" them and pretending that everything is OK and that I've got it all together and that I've got the world on a string - I'm just going to be ME today - and let these emotions run their course.

I know laughter will return at some point today ... it's just a matter of time. I know optimism will creep back in... and the glass will be half FULL again. I know that LIVING IN MY EMOTIONS is the healthiest thing for me to do for myself today.

Carpe Diem!!!

What my heart has been singing lately... (Jan '06)

Lyrics to "I Will Not Be Broken"... as performed by Bonnie Raitt

That was then this is now - Found my way back here somehow - Knew you'd have to let me go - Told you once I told you so

Take me down - You can hold me but you - Can't hold what's within - Pull me round - Push me to the limit - Maybe I may bend - But I know where I'm not going - I will not be broken - I will not be broken - I will not be...

Someone other than who I am - I will fight to make my stand - Cause what is livin' if I can't live free - What is freedom if I can't be me

Take me down - You can hold me but you - Can't hold what's within - Pull me round - Push me to the limit - Maybe I may bend - But I know where I'm not going - I will not be broken - I will not be broken - I will not be...

I won't let you near it - I will let my spirit fly - Fly - High - Oh take me down

Take me down - You can hold me but you - Can't hold what's within - Pull me round - Push me to the limit - Maybe I may bend - But I know where I'm not going - I will not be broken - I will not be broken - I will not be...

Recuperation! (Jan '06)

Anyone who knows me (even for a short time) knows that I do not sit still very well. I am constantly running... constantly thinking about the next thing to accomplish, the next thing to get involved with, the next thing to mark off my "to do before I die" list, the next thing to volunteer for, etc. Some see me as the classic over-achiever trying to set world records for Guiness... but in all reality I just don't believe in getting rusty.

To those worried about me living a full life - you'll be relieved to know that I slowed down this week. This last week I SAT. I sat back in my pajamas and watched way too much TV and expected others' to do things for me and FULLY ENJOYED every minute of it.

Actually - I couldn't do much to change the circumstances! So I sat back and enjoyed my surroundings - I enjoyed every last "get well" card and flower bouquet and email message wishing me back on my feet.

Last Friday (Jan 20th) I had my gall bladder removed. This was my first time in surgery (I hate to break it to everyone - but having your wisdom teeth pulled isn't much of a "surgery"... not like this anyway)... and hopefully I will not have to go through too many more surgeries. All went well - and I'm recuperating speedily. And I'm feeling extremely better today than I was yesterday. And hopefully tomorrow will bring even more of an improvement.

In the meantime I will continue to make the most of the circumstances and catch up on some reading, phone calls, visits with family and friends... such is the life! Now if I can just figure out a way to keep this many fresh flower bouquets in my house at all times...

Conflict with "The Book of Daniel" (Jan '06)

If you have not read about the conflict with the new NBC show "The Book of Daniel"... you should take a few minutes to sit back and look into it. Take just a few minutes to look at the true conflict here...

The main character is a pill-popping Episcopal priest with a gay son and a daughter selling drugs, a wife who drives away daily problems with regular martinis, and a recently widowed sister-in-law who has also just "come out of the closet". The priest has a regular visitor - Jesus. Like a cartoon character Jesus pops into the scene to confront the priest and apparently the priest is the only who seems Him. They appear to have regular chats - even cynically laughing at the way things are and making light of the ironies in the priest's life.

What's the conflict? Due to thousands of complaints about the show many affiliate stations across America have cancelled the airing of this show and replaced it with re-runs of something else. According to Yahoo! news the complaints are being submitted to NBC via phone, email, fax and some of them on church letterhead.

But my initial question is "How much more real can you get?!" When I was growing up my dad was a pastor. And while we didn't deal with THESE types of issues in our home, some of these issues were present in our home churches. I know that the reality of our home was a lot like this priest's home in the sense that we all had our own short-comings, our own set of temptations, our own "drama" - after all, NO ONE is perfect nor completely righteous.

And as the TV priest, played by Aidan Quinn, deals with problems in his family, his church and his own person he shows that the Grace of God gets Him through every day. Doesn't man - even those called to be priests and pastors and biblical teachers - all have issues of our own?! And isn't that why we believe in the Grace of God to start with?! The fact that Christ still loves us ... and that after "falling short" of others' expectations of what a Christian should be we can turn around and chat with Jesus. And while Jesus might have done it differently - Jesus is not condoning the behavior. He's showing the priest (and the tv viewers) that grace is there to comfort everyone and to show that He's not abandoning us because of our personal issues or how we react to them.

While my caution to this show would be - let's make sure they continue to do their best to be Christ-like (humble, gracious, holy even in persecution, acknowledging sin and where it stems from and how to be free of it, etc)... and in the meantime let's sit back and see just where we fall on the "holy scale"... this priest's life may not be far from our own.

In my humble opinion - this TV show may end up to be the best witness of Christ's love - ON TV!!! Do you think NBC knows what they are doing with the airing of this show?! I say "AIR IT!" If nothing else, it's getting people to question the authenticity of their own beliefs - and the depth of love Jesus has for all of us!

Once upon a time... (Jan '06)

Below is yet another life lesson I've run across. But more importantly than running across it - to know that I've learned this as well in my own life... I needed to share this because it speaks volumes!

------
Once upon a time, there was an island where all the feelings lived: Happiness, Sadness, Knowledge, and all of the others, including Love. One day it was announced to the feelings that the island would sink, so they all prepared their boats and left.

Love was the only one who stayed. Love wanted to stay with the island until it started sinking. When love was almost sinking, he decided to ask for help. Richness came by Love in a beautiful boat. Love said, "Richness, can you take me with you?" Richness answered, "No, I can't ... there is a lot of gold and silver in my boat. There is no place here for you." Love decided to ask Vanity who was also passing by. "Vanity, please help me!" "I can't help you Love. You are all wet and you may damage my boat," Vanity answered. Sadness was close by so again Love asked for help, "Sadness, let me go with you." " Oh... Love, I am so sad that I prefer to go alone!" Happiness passed by Love too, but she was so happy that she did not listen when love called her!

Suddenly, there was a voice, "Come Love, I will take you." It was an elder. Love became so happy that he even forgot to ask the elder her name. When they arrived on the dry land, the elder went on her own way. Love asked Knowledge, another elder, the name of the elder who had helped him. "It was Time," answered Knowledge. "Time? But why did Time help me?" asked Love. "Because only time is capable of understanding how great Love is," answered Knowledge.

The moral of this story is: "Take the time to know what Real Love is". - author unknown

HAPPY Freakin' NEW YEAR!!! (Dec '05)

This is only for those who need it… those who already have it all together and are already the best you can be – just ignore this entry… but for the rest of US… ;-)

Let’s “ring in the New Year” with a new attitude! For every one of us who has a bad day – we all know there’s nothing wrong with feeling down – but there DOES come a time to snap out of it when it’s time to snap out of it! I'd like to take some inspiration from another nugget of truth I recently read ... don’t let anyone steal the joy which is ONLY YOURS! Don’t focus on the unfortunate parts of the day – instead find MANY reasons to celebrate life every day! For every one of us who has had a “string of bad luck” – pick yourself up by your bra straps or boot straps (or whatever it is you’re wearing) and get over it already!

We are ever so lucky to live in a FREE country, to have a roof over our heads, food on our tables, warm clothing … so revel in the comfort of your Home and in the warm love of your Friends and Family! While they may be all some of us can call our own at least we’ve got them!!! That’s plenty to celebrate… now get about your daily celebrations… and remember what I said about not letting others steal your joy!

Is Re-Gifting OK?! (Dec '05)

It's an age-old question... when is it OK to re-gift? We've come up with our own answer in our household. Answer: On New Year's Eve! So at our annual countdown party we are starting to do a "re-gifting exchange" (white elephant style). (Don't worry Mom - none of your presents will be re-gifted - you did good this year!)

We just love seeing what others' received ... and sitting around and laughing about it all night long while we wait for the "ball to drop"...

I can't wait... to have friends around and laugh and enjoy the evening playing games, sharing stories and stealing others' horrible Christmas presents! I can't wait!!!

Got Gall Bladder? (Dec '05)

On Wednesday, I found out what I had been fearing... I have multiple gall stones. And then we met with a surgeon on Thursday to discuss having my gall bladder removed in the near future. Apparently hundreds of thousands of people have so far survived without their gall bladders!!!

So, I've never had my gall bladder removed before and not quite sure what to expect. (Yes, I'm still just as spicy as ever!) This will be scheduled for just after the New Year. And I hear the recovery is pretty speedy these days as it's a laparoscopic surgery... so they don't have to make a 6 inch long incision anymore. NICE!

Updates will be posted as they come...

Merry Christmas!!! (Dec '05)

Can I just say how bummed out I am about being politically correct this time of year?! Maybe it's just living in Southern California where we're bombarded with everyone making a big deal about taking the word "Christmas" out of Christmas!!! Even Target is now selling only "Holiday Trees". GIVE ME A FREAKIN' BREAK!!!

If you don't want to celebrate Christmas - then don't! At Halloween I don't buy anything w/ witches or ghouls or zombies on it... but I don't start up with an act of Congress to get witches removed from October 31st! What happened to the diversity this nation was built upon?!

However - some of the Christmas cards I make every year will read "Happy Holidays"... as we rub elbows with people of varied beliefs... buddhist, muslim, jewish, christian, even atheist... and while "Happy Holidays" doesn't EXCLUDE Christmas it welcomes everyone else's beliefs in the same breath. Just don't tell me I have to take CHRIST out of Christmas!

MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY HOLIDAYS!!!

Sure glad I'm flexible!!! (Dec '05)

For the readers of my last entry... "Flexibility"... you'll be happy to know I'm fed a little bit of own medicine from time to time. At times maybe I'm tested to see if I really stand by my own little blog blurbs. This week was a good week to test me! And boy can I tell you - the surprises have been abundant!

It's the Christmas season so of course things are truckin' right along. It's the busiest time of year for my work at the investment firm - as everyone is counting their losses and dumping them so they don't have to pay so much in taxes. Requests into our office have increased substantially for about a month now and we're doing the best we can with all these trade requests - but when you're constantly explaining to the people on the phone that their request is just 1 of the 1,000 other requests sitting on the back of the desk - a little bit of frustration tends to settle in. But, we make it through ... somehow. Every year we've made it through.

Then at home - let's also think about taking down the Fall decorations and dusting off the Christmas decor, finishing up the Christmas shopping (which also involves wrapping and sending since 90% of the family lives out of state), ... oh - and don't forget, we make our own Christmas cards around here! And don't forget about that baking that you want to do so much! Or those poinsettias you bought to share with other families for a little bit of extra cheer!

Throw into the mix a little bit of a medical scare that happened at 1:45 am Wednesday... when I was awoken to THE most excruciating pain I've ever experienced! I clearly remember my first thought being - "If I pass out I want to have on clean undies... but there's no way I'm going to be able to shave my legs with this pain!!!" Somehow I got dressed. And we debated whether or not we should call 911 or if Lee should drive me to the emergency room. While I've not gone through child birth (as the MOTHER figure in the ordeal) I can only imagine this pain ranked right up there with labor. Thankfully, the pain subsided about an hour later. My Doctor has since ordered a gallbladder ultrasound for Dec 22nd... no big deal - I'm not doing anything else that week! (Say that back to yourself - but make sure you say it with just a tad sarcasm!)

THEN - while I'm taking a nap on Wednesday, my husband wakes me to say "Babe - there's a special delivery for you." I understandably snap back "Can you SIGN for it?!" (Thoughts to myself: "Are you KIDDING me?!") And he looks down the hallway and motions this "special delivery" back to the bedroom and I mutter "What the heck?!" Into the bedroom walk my parents!!!

This is just a BIT of surprise as I had just talked to my mom earlier. She SAID they were just flying back into Portland and were on the road home. She filled me in on their week in Dallas (visiting my lil' bro and sis-in-law for an early Christmas along w/ the grandparents). Well, apparently my mother also likes to plan surprises!!!

So it's now Dec 10th... and last night was my company's annual holiday staff party - which turned out to be quite the shin-dig. So Lee and I left Mom and Dad for an evening on their own and enjoyed a Roarin' '20s party - we even got a bit dressed for the part. And had a great time! Today the Christmas tree goes up and Mom & Dad will help w/ the festivities. The holiday tunes are playing in the background. This surprise visit has been just what the doctor ordered - especially since we didn't get to see Mom & Dad for Christmas last year. Thank God for surprises ... and for flexibility!

Flexibility (Nov '05)

Dictionary.com defines "Flexibility" as "1a. Capable of being bent or flexed; pliable. 1b. Capable of being bent repeatedly without injury or damage."

It is an innate belief of mine that remaining flexible throughout life will bring us all just a little more happiness and contentment. In our fast paced and self-absorbed world of "we do it your way", "instant personalization", "made when you order it" mantras it would be rather easy to get wrapped up in the thoughts of 'if I could just tweak it THIS way then I would be happy.' Or 'if I could just make it THAT way then I would finally be content.'

But I think this mentality has served to accomplish the exact opposite. Expectations are then built up that we can have it exactly how we want it ... and when it isn't that simple we get all bent out of shape. Our attitude goes sour and we start taking it out on others.

Flip the coin.... if we weren't raised in a world where "your wish is my command" then our expectations might be a bit different... a little less self-absorbed maybe?! And just MAYBE we'd be a little more willing to be OK with what was presented to us and completely grateful when someone goes out of their way for us ... instead of simply EXPECTING that of others ... Just a tad more appreciative, enthralled, respectful, fun to be around... you know...

Disclaimer to those who know me well: While I often move things off of "today's to do list"... I don't necessarily consider that "flexibility"... that's more like "procrastination"!

Belly Laughs (Nov '05)

There's a typical routine at the Tisdale house on Tuesday nights. It's Girls night (Gilmore Girls)! And the home is usually ringing with laughter... because the home has welcomed Debbie Russell-Graff. First we'll have dinner while getting caught up on each other's weeks, while also talking about family and friend news, then maybe looking at some of my recent pics or talking about work or doing a little stamping/card making and then moving into the living room for the 8 o'clock hour and Gilmore Girls!!!

This past Tuesday night was no exception. Well, maybe one exception. I was so caught by surprise with something Debbie said (not an unusual event) that I simply could not control myself. I had just taken a large swig of my vanilla coke ... and well, I laughed so hard that I sprayed Debbie with that swig!!! Of course the spraying then perpetuated more laughter... and most of the hard work she had spent on stamping was of course thrown in the trash because Debbie, our work table, and even the chairs behind her had been splattered!!!

As I sit back and think about the friends with whom I have shared true belly laughs I am blessed to be reminded of "the good times" and the hysterical moments of laughter (which quite often include embarrassing moments for yours truly). Some more of these moments:
- recently, in Oregon visiting the Childers (friends for over 25 years) where we had both resounding laughter and some painful tears
- while relaxing with friends at the "Cove" (SCC)
- on a road trip with my family as Mom, Loren and I sang to each other at the midnight hour and made Dad so mad he yelled at us
- with my co-worker and soon-to-be "friend" Julia Alter as we realized we were "kindergarten friends" (stealing chunks of chocolate from the cake we were taking back to the office after a retirement party)
- at Fat Ivor's with my girls Stephanie and Betty as they danced on the laminate floor while I karaoked my heart out to "Copacabana" for the first time
- every time I look at the picture of Lee and I (which Eddie snapped) where I am whole-heartedly slapping myself on the butt
- the afternoon Lee and I played with the distortion tool on Photoshop and created a very unique "family portrait" of ourselves ... we laughed so hard I almost pee'd and he almost quit breathing
- making Christmas cards last year with Kellye Wilborn, Lisa Powell and Debbie listening to Christmas music... and all of a sudden cats are meowing to "Jingle Bells"!
- that warm, summer Sunday afternoon with Julia and Lisa Medina-Kunitzer... more importatly later that evening when we went to Chili's and sat in the bar and pretended to be visiting from Texas (even donning the accent, new names and dressed for the part)
- anything that has to do with Loren and the rest of the boys "Beating Eggs"
- most family occasions where the Marshek cousins are present
- late nights of toilet papering with the youth group (even Mom got in on the action) and anything that has to do with Andy Mizerak or Kendra Groves-Hankins
- and with Debbie there are similar countless memories to recall ... that's what happens with roomies!

Belly laughs... good times... making friendships stronger, futures brighter and memories richer!

What would life sound like, look like, feel like without laughter?! All I know is, I don't want to know the answer to that one! Live well... Laugh often... Love much!

Fallen leaves... (Nov '05)

It's now November... and the trees have turned colors. And they've started shedding their beautifully adorned branches.

Evidence is the piles of leaves along the side of the road.

Just got back to Southern California from an autumn trip to Salem, Bend and Redmond, Oregon. There's some BREATHTAKING colors in them ther' hills!

How lucky was I... to be walking through Drake Park in Bend one afternoon when a large gust of wind picked up a pile of leaves... they tumbled across at least 100 feet of grass... and that noise (the rustling) just warmed my heart!

Can anyone tell this is my favorite time of year?!

What does Tuesday morning feel like?

On the Tuesdays when I'm doing my USUAL thing... it feels like silver. It's cold... at 4 am when the alarm goes off. But I slip right into the shower, then wisk through the kitchen and into the car w/ the cold leather seat at 5 am ... to hurry up and get on the freeway and dart my way through traffic to get to work. Then it feels like artichoke green... where I walk into the investment firm with carpet the color of money and sit down and do my thing.

BUT TODAY... it feels like blue. It's drizzling outside... and that makes me happy! It's 7:15 am ... and I'm still at home. Here I quietly sit... listening to Norah Jones and drinking my espresso from my favorite porcelain mug from Starbucks (which my dear husband so thoughtfully cleaned for me last night knowing I'd want it first thing this morning).

Today I fly to Oregon to spend a week with my parents, grandparents and lil' brother and sister-in-law. My uncle and his wife will fly in later in the week and we will bake and cook and most likely sing together and laugh like no family has laughed... and reminisce and share our life experiences... and hopefully the girls will all go out and get massages while the boys play tennis... and we'll go for country drives...

And then it will feel orange and rusty. And I can't wait for that feeling!

Katrina victim now a millionaire!

I was highly disturbed this am by the following blurb in the news "Hurricane Katrina evacuee Jacquelyn Sherman won $1.6 million Tuesday playing the slots on whim."

OK - so, great... she's set. Good for her.

But can I ask "WHY WAS SHE PLAYING THE SLOTS?!" She's lost everything! In fact, let me ask another question... "SINCE SHE LOST EVERYTHING, WHERE DID SHE GET THE MONEY TO PLAY THE SLOTS?!" And secondly, "WHY WASN'T SHE SAVING HER MONEY or LOOKING FOR A NEW JOB?!" Oh, I don't know... maybe she could even set the money aside for acquiring things she'd recently lost?

Instead she's gambling ... What kind of sign of false hope is this?! Are people taking their $2,000 debit cards from FEMA and gambling w/ the free cash-ola in hopes of making something of themselves?! Or are they buying a new wardrobe so they can get a new job in their new city? Or buying necessities for their children or family? Or paying for room and board at the places that have so generously opened their doors for them?!

Apparently some feel it's ok to gamble it away... and simply take for granted what's been given to them in their time of devastation and need. This makes me DOWNRIGHT SICK this morning!

But who knows, maybe I'm the only one who is so disturbed by this...

The problem with masks...

From one of the most inspiring authors of my generation...

"We are people of both dignity and depravity. The hurricane blew back more than roofs; it blew the mask off the nature of mankind. The main problem in the world is not Mother Nature, but human nature. Strip away the police barricades, blow down the fences, and the real self is revealed. " - Max Lucado

How ironic... the Mardi Gras being what it is with masks and other traditions. To then read this quote. For now, those masks have been taken away. What has been left? True human nature.

K is for Kindness...

I have to admit... the images on the news and the heart wrenching stories of loss have me angry. I'm mad that our high-tech 21st century communications failed so badly that assistance to the Southeast couldn't have been coordinated for days. But I'm also seething about the bashing of President Bush and our federal government and our aid groups. Every time I turn on the TV I hear our media searching out ways to point the finger in attempts to find someone to blame. Instead of focusing on the hope and the recovery and the good that is now happening in the southeast they point out the negative, the bad, the inhumane...

In fact, the article about how their initial sweep for corpses resulted in way fewer than they thought would be found was such a SMALL article... when the Mayor's initial guesstimate was 10,000... this is GREAT news! Why did it get hidden in the news next to the prediction of which movie would take the box office this weekend?!

Listen... it's not President Bush's fault that Katrina hit. Or that the levees were only built to sustain a category 3 storm didn't hold or that people drowned in their attics. It's not Bush's fault that the city did an emergency response test last year which resulted in enhancement suggestions that were never acted upon. It's not Mayor Ray Nagin's fault that anarchy reigned at the Superdome or that he never formalized the city's "state of emergency" status or that he couldn't coordinate better security at the Superdome or that he's not being the superb leader Guiliani was on 9/11. It's not the residents' fault for not evacuating after the numerous warnings - even though their city is BELOW sea level. It's not Sean Penn's fault that he couldn't rescue more people from their homes because he had so many of his entourage on his boat. It just is. It just is what it is... now let's move on!

How telling have the last fews days been - on both sides. The celebrities coming to the rescue because they felt no one else was. How about the afternoon talk show idol who has always sworn to never get politically involved - she finally has decided to join the crowd by throwing darts at the proverbial Bush dart board. Compare that to the directors of institutions and private business men in San Diego chartering their own planes to rescue evacuees. To the many churches in the New Orleans and Mississippi areas who last month were bickering with each other - who this week are working TOGETHER as ONE body of Christ to help those in need!

NO - it's not at all the media's fault that they have their own agenda or that they don't point out the hope and the grace and the people doing GOOD... instead pointing out who's NOT doing something. It's not Sean Penn's fault that he couldn't rescue more people from their homes because he had so many of his entourage on his boat.

So why are we wasting time pointing out fault and blaming people who aren't truly in control when there's work to be done? Send money, send medical supplies, send people... just send. PRAY and prepare for healing.

While we may not understand how God will bring something good from this disaster - we do know that God is sovereign. And while today we may not understand His master plan... I simply don't think we're supposed to. We should rely on His everlasting grace to restore dignity and humanity and peace and hope to all those in loss. Give to World Vision or Samaritan's Purse or Desire Street or Salvation Army or the American Red Cross or any other humanitarian group you feel is forthright... just don't point any more fingers and suggest that one human doesn't care for another human in their moments of despair.

I'm sick and tired of it.... and I don't think I'm the only one that feels that way...

If these walls could talk... (Aug '05)

I live in a quaint little neighborhood made up of homes built anywhere between the late 1800s to 1970 or so. The majority of our OLDER homes were built between 1920 - 1940. These are the homes I want to know more about... specifically mine!

When I fell in love w/ my home I was told it was built in 1940. However, last night I met a man by the name of Wes Boyle who says his grandparents lived in my home in the 1930's!!! No wonder this old house creaks and moans somedays!

I now have yet another project to work on. Who were the Wessels who lived here in the 1930's? What did they do with their lives? What kind of legacy did they leave behind? And do they know anything else about my house? What was the original floor plan and square footage? And when did they do all of these add-ons?

If these walls could talk... I'm sure I might find out way more than I ever wanted to know! Until then, I'm still in love with my 1400 square foot home - 3 bedroom/1 bath with the EXTRA large kitchen. This is the first HOME I ever fell in love with. What I love most is the den at the back of the house looking out over the treetops of Old Escondido! How relaxing it is to work on my photography, watercolor, make cards and do scrapbooking! Now, if I could just keep from looking out into the backyard to see all of the weeds creeping up between our beautiful flowers... which reminds me of yet another project...